Ok we got it out. But we dont know how were going to get it back in.
Just a fyi for future suspension installers: The way we were able to do this was gripping the hell out of the exposed part of the bolt between the mount and the rubber bushing, while turning the bolt. This works, but the grip needed is tremendous.
That is the proper way to do it (allen key method) but, on my car it stripped the allen key portion (using the correct size) so... I just went and bought 2 new endlinks, they are only about $30 each for brand new ones.
Just an update. YOU DONT HAVE TO TAKE THE ENDLINKS OFF. I spoke with In2Twins who explained that the since the swaybar isnt preloaded if you jack up both sides evenly you will be able to remove the strut without even touching the endlink.
When we tried this we were able to do this incredibly quickly. Just for anyone who ends up doing this.
The method we use is to heat up the nut with a gas torch or O/A torch, being careful not to burn the rubber. Keep a bottle of waqter handy to spray the rubber as you go. Once the nut is fairly hot, spray it quickly to cool it down. This should free the bond between nut and bolt. It's best to impact the nut off as you want to overcome the static friction rather than just wrench on it and have it spin, which it may do anyway. Use the heat method and sharp impact on almost any fastener and you will have much greater success.
If you are changing your bars, just unbolt from the bar and leave the links attached to the car.